Depressed Les» Psychology

“More than your biochemistry…”

Leslie — Thu, 04 Jun 2009 12:38:05 +0000

This article was on the Psychology Today website. The author believes that “Depression is more a social problem than a medical one, and no purely biological cure will be found for it any more than biology alone will cure other social ills such as poverty or child abuse”.

I think this is an interesting theory and one that I definitely buy into. In the last month of improvements I’ve seen in my life, my medication dosages have not changed, but my attitude has- and this has improved my relationship with Tareak and my view of myself.

Let’s Expand Our View of Depression: You’re More Than Your Biochemistry

By Michael D. Yapko, Ph.D. on June 2, 2009 – 8:29am in The Social Side of Depression

The costs of depression on a variety of levels are huge: Marriages and families splinter, individuals suffer, societies suffer the consequences of the often destructive behaviors of people coping badly or not at all with their depression, businesses suffer the negative effects of employees too disabled to function properly, the economic costs of greater health care expenses are greater for depressed patients, and there is the tragedy of suicide – lives lost to despair and apathy. Depression is a terribly disabling disorder, and despite significant advances in treatment, the problem continues to grow.

Depression is a multi-dimensional disorder. It has biological components based in genetics, neurochemistry and physical health, it has psychological components that involve many individual factors such as cognitive style, coping style, and qualities of personal behavior. And, it has social components, factors that are mediated by the quality of one’s relationships, including such variables as the family and the culture one is socialized into, and one’s range of social skills. The best, most accurate answer to the basic question, “What causes depression?” is, “Many things.”

Currently, the medical model of depression receives the greatest attention for a variety of reasons. The pharmaceutical industry in particular has invested tens of billions of dollars in advertising to the public as well as investing directly in individual physicians, encouraging all to define depression as a disease caused by a neurochemical imbalance that requires medication to manage. The lion’s share of research money goes to drug research, further elevating drugs to the status of being the source of hope for everyone who suffers depression. As a result, antidepressants are the most widely prescribed medication in the U.S., and are considered a first-line treatment approach, de-emphasizing the value of psychotherapy despite its success not only in treatment, but in the area of prevention.

It may sound extreme to some, but I stand by this statement: Depression is more a social problem than a medical one, and no purely biological cure will be found for it any more than biology alone will cure other social ills such as poverty or child abuse. This is not to say that antidepressant medications shouldn’t be a part of treatment, especially in those specific instances where there are clear benefits medication can provide over psychotherapy. Rather, medications should be used more carefully and with an associated recommendation for a well-considered skill-building psychotherapy.

The social side of depression is especially important, yet is terribly under-considered in most people’s consideration. We know, for example, that depression runs in families: The child of a depressed parent is anywhere from three to six times more likely to become depressed than the child of a non-depressed parent. The genetics research makes it quite clear that it isn’t entirely – or even mostly – faulty genes responsible, especially since there is no “depression gene.” It has more to do with the patterns of thinking, coping, behaving, and relating that parents (and other significant role models in our society) model day in and day out than it does one’s genetic makeup. When you have the largest demographic group of depression sufferers now raising children, it should surprise no one that their children are the fastest growing group of depression sufferers. After all, parents can’t teach their children what they don’t know.

Furthermore, the more distressed one’s marriage, the more likely one is to either already be or to become depressed. The quality of one’s marriage is a very large risk factor, yet many people never consider how powerful a good marriage can be in helping insulate its members against depression. These points provide excellent reasons to want to strengthen parents and marriages.

To think of depression as only an individual’s biochemical disorder, as if he or she isn’t a product of powerful social forces that operate in families, organizations, and cultures, or to reduce it even further to a purely biochemical phenomenon, is so terribly reductionistic as to disempower the very people who need help changing their lives, not just their brain chemistry. It’s true: You are more than your biochemistry.

You can learn more when you visit my website: www.yapko.com. When visiting, be sure to sign up to receive my free bi-monthly newsletter.

New Growth

Leslie — Sun, 31 May 2009 12:24:36 +0000

Right now in life I feel a lot like this tree. When we went to visit Tareak’s family in Australia we saw some of the devastation the fires caused. Even though it had only been a couple of months since the fires, there was already life growing from the burnt logs and trees.

I was a burnt tree. There wasn’t any visible life left in me. I couldn’t see the point in trying to repair something that seemed beyond hope. In the past month I have felt the stirrings of life inside of me and it has now sprouted to the point it is visible to others. I am able to get out of bed without any internal resistance. I feel like I have more energy. My relationship with Tareak has significantly improved. Overall I just feel BETTER! So what has changed?

While in Australia I noticed something for the first time. In conversations with others, I had very little to say about myself or my experiences. I did have a lot to say about Tareak though. My curiosity was peaked and I began to do some research. I started seeing words and phrases like, “Codependence”, “White Knight Syndrome”, “Obsessive Love”, “Overdependence”. Basically what I was seeing is that I had a low self-worth. This is different from self-esteem. Because I didn’t see much worth in myself, it became easy to put anything and everything before my own wants and NEEDS. I had convinced myself that by completely focusing on the needs and wants of others I could find self worth and they would value me because I had helped them so much. The more I read, the more I realized this is a serious condition. It is a disease. An addiction. “Oh Great!” I thought, “Just another ailment to add to my list”. I’ve read three books on the subject now, and have learned that while it is a serious condition, it is treatable. This is where the stirrings of hope and new life began.

My allergies this year have seemed worse than usual. During all waking hours I am an itchy sniffly mess. My sister suggested acupuncture for allergies and I thought “Why not? Nothing else is working.” I found an acupuncturist that specializes in getting rid of allergies. I went to my appointment with zero expectations. I found that she actually uses a technique called “NAET” which is a mixture of acupuncture, kinesthetics, chiropractics, etc… Had I researched the technique ahead of time I would have never made the appointment because the results sound too good to be true. I have only had 2 appointment and have been treated for my allergy to eggs and lactose. NAET suggests that most ailments are caused by underlying allergies in the body and if those allergies are eliminated the ailment will clear up. It claims to heal depression, anxiety, OCD, and a huge list of other problems. Had I not seen the definite improvements after my two appointments I would be skeptical, but now I have hope. The idea of being allergy free is more than I ever thought possible.

It is almost summer. We have had a warm and sunny spring. The sun is healing. The sun makes me happy to get out of bed. I have also been taking Vitamin D supplements for a month and have noticed a change in my mood. I don’t know if it is just the weather, or if the Vitamin D is helping, but I have no complaints either way.

Between learning about co-dependence, how to treat my allergies and the healing effects of the sun and Vitamin D, I am feeling good. I still have several books to read on my conditions, but I think I am off to a good start. Hopefully you won’t even recognize me in a few months. Instead of a burnt stump I will be a huge green tree oozing with new life.

Facebook Social Anxiety

Leslie — Thu, 07 May 2009 22:04:50 +0000

Since much of my social interaction these days is limited to the computer, it would make sense that there would also be some social anxiety involved. I always have a tremendous amount of anxiety when I request for someone to be my “friend” on Facebook. Many times the requests are to people that I haven’t seen or talked to in many years. I start wondering:

“Are they going to think I’m a nerd for asking them to be my friend?”

“Were they really my friend years ago, or were they just humoring me and are now glad not to have contact with me?”

“Why haven’t they already requested my friendship?”

“I was never really good friends with them, only an acquaintance. Am I being too forward in assuming they want to be my friend?”

“Are they just going to think I’m nosey and want to see their profile and know that I really don’t want to be their friend?”

Once I muster up the courage to ask them to be my friend (I often feel like a pathetic little child begging for friendship) the waiting game begins. If they haven’t responded to my request in 24 hours I start wondering:

“Maybe they don’t use Facebook that often and they just haven’t seen my request.”

“They are probably telling all their “real” friends about the request they just got from Leslie and are having a good laugh because I thought we could be friends.”

“Maybe they don’t want to be my friend.”

Then once they accept my friend request my mind still can’t rest. It is plagued with questions like:

“Did they just accept my friend request because they didn’t want to make me feel bad?”

“Am I one of those people they accept as a friend but then never look at my profile because they don’t care enough to see what I’m up to?”

I also have anxiety when some people ask me to be their friend. I accept the friend request 99% of the time, but everyone falls into a certain category in my mind. The categories are as follows:
-There are the people that I am genuinely excited to make contact with. I usually send them an e-mail or short message after accepting them as a friend because I am so excited to hear from them. When I don’t receive one of these “I’m so excited to hear from you…” messages from people I request as friends I assume they are just accepting my friendship out of pity.
-There are the people I haven’t heard from or talked to in years that I am happy to know still exist, but I have no idea what to say to them or if they are looking for a full blown reunion, so I just quietly accept their request and check their profile every so often for any updates.
-There are people that request my friendship that I don’t even know, but know Tareak. Tareak can’t be bothered to create his own Facebook account, and so all of his friends request to be friends with me. I always check with him before adding them, and then on days when I’m feeling bad about myself I go into my Facebook account and count how many people are my friends and how many are Tareak’s, as though it is some sort of competition. I am always bummed that he has almost as many friend as I do and it isn’t even his account.
-Lastly there are the people that I would never consider requesting their friendship, but for whatever reason they want to be friends with me. I start asking myself, “Do they actually think we are friends?”, “Are they just trying to get a lot of friends by requesting friendship with everyone they have spoken to in their entire life?”, “Are they really curious enough about my life that they want access to my profile?- If so, I am kinda flattered in a strange way.”

Oh the dramas of having a Facebook account. Who knew it could be so complicated? I guess my life could be worse… =)

Short Blogging Break

Leslie — Thu, 30 Apr 2009 00:18:13 +0000

I have a pile of almost a dozen books I need to read. I had a rather large breakthrough in figuring out how to treat my depression. In order to fix myself I first need to have a DESIRE to fix myself and believe that I am worth fixing. While this might sound obvious to you, it was not obvious to me- and that is the problem. I have always preferred “fixing” others and ignoring my own issues and so they have been buried for too long. I’m hoping that when I get through all the books I will have a deeper understanding of myself and also a stronger sense of self worth. Until I believe that I am worth “fixing” and am motivated to help MYSELF, instead of someone else, there is no point in addressing my depression. Wish me luck!